MINDLESS MUSINGS

Walking down to Tempe reserve to participate in another night of underage drinking beer and sharing stories with our mates; Wayne and I had just withdrawn our share of the beer money from the service station on the Princes Highway. We were standing on the median waiting for a part in the traffic. Our timing was terrible because as we stepped off to cross the next lanes of traffic a car came very close to hitting us and had to screech his tyres to avoid a collision.

We made it to the other side and were laughing about the near miss. As we began walking down Station Street a car came racing down and drove up on the gutter blocking our way. A very solid Maori man leaped out of the car and was running towards us; it was clear he wasn’t planning on hugging us with joy.

“Don’t! Don’t!” was all that could be heard from the female passenger.

“Don’t what?” we both thought.

The car was up on the gutter so that we could not go back up the street. Our only escape was down the street, but the Maori dude was heading to cut that route off too. A boat was parked and the tip of its trailer formed a kind of low barricade.

Wayne was faster than me and he leapt the trailer and bolted down the street. The man jumped out in front of me and had his arms outstretched. He looked absolutely furious.

I remember thinking why is this guy so angry? If he is upset that he nearly hit us it seems odd that he would now want to tear me limb from limb; but unfortunately that was what I was facing.

Between his outstretched arm and the boat trailer there was precious little room for me to escape. Have you ever heard the stories about how adrenaline can help people do amazing things? Well this must have been one of those times.

Do you believe in miracles?

Somehow I managed to do some kind of hurdle and duck combo which propelled me just high enough to clear the boat trailer, while still keeping me low enough to avoid my potential assailant’s outstretched arm. I was through and still on my feet. I ran as fast as my skinny legs could carry me. I caught Wayne pretty fast (this all happened in a matter of seconds) and we both bolted down the road until we came to a friend’s house.

We slipped inside and crouched behind the fence. Thankfully our pursuer had given up and gone away. Thank God!

It was only later in the evening after downing a few beers that I found out why that guy was so angry. After our near miss, the driver had honked his horn at us and Wayne, in his infinite wisdom, thought it was a good idea to give him the finger.

“You dickhead” was all I could say. “No wonder he was fired up”

We were only about 16 at the time and this was a grown ass man, built like a brick shithouse, pumped up on adrenaline and fury. I shudder to think the damage he may have done had he gotten a hold of one of us.

Another near miss to add to the list.